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Poetry
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12. Epilogue: Nevertheless
The bookbag on my back. I'm out the door. Winter turns to spring The way it does, and I buy dresses. A year later, it gets to where When they say How are you feeling, With that anxious look on their faces, And I start to tell them the latest ... |
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| 31 Days of Pink Ribbon Poetry: Introduction | |
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7. Wintering
It snows and stops, now it is January, The houseplants need feeding, The guests have gone. Today I'm half a boy, Flat as something innocent, a clean Plate, just needing a story. A woman should be able to say I've become an Amazon, Warrior... |
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9. Healing
Brilliant- A day that is less than zero Icicles fat as legs of deer Hang in a row from the porch roof A hand without a mitten Grabs and breaks one off- A brandished javelin Made of sheer Stolen light To which the... |
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Cancer Scripts, in poems and pictures
Introductionby Alysa CummingsThe therapist listens. Listens to all of it. Listens and nods in places. Murmurs the occasional uh-huh to keep me talking. With her encouragement, I slowly spill details from my cancer story. The current chapter just... |
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CancerLand in the First Person
Introduction CancerLand. Where's that, you may ask... It's the oncologist's waiting room. It's a blue barcalounger in the chemo lounge behind a closed door at the end of a long hallway. It's a shop in the mall where you can try on wigs before... |
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| Instant Fill in the Blanks Poetry | |
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Pink Ribbon Poetry
Introduction to Pink Ribbon Poetry Countless poetry books fill the mantel over the fireplace in my living room. Some of the books stand upright; some stack up sideways, titles facing out, to save precious inches of space. Others spill over into... |
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Spirit o' Spring - Poems
Introduction Six brown paper bags, stuffed almost to bursting, sit at the bottom of my basement steps. Long empty of groceries, each bag is filled with another sweet necessity entirely. I inspect these bags every time I pass by. Even as I struggle... |
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A Connection
A CONNECTION Sitting here, I was thinking. Why do I stay so involved with cancer. I don't have it. But I am surrounded, by people who are going through it. Is it because I don't want to feel as if I've beaten it? So long the... |
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A Mistake?
Cancer is the one word No one wants to hear It brings out feelings Of sadness, anger and fear There must be some mistake They can't mean you There's so much left to life You've so much more to do Anyone can get cancer If it strikes... |
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A Promise to Eurydice
Do not go, my love--oh, do not leave so soon Familiar halls and rooms that know your touch. I want another April, May and June, I want--oh still the wanting is so much. What--forty years gone by? Why need we more When those before us fill us... |
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A Runner's High
Copyright © 1995-1997, Carolyn Temple I used to laugh, I used to run I thought life should be lots of fun. The Dr said my brain tumor was benign as if he thought I'd be just fine. But the hell was soon to follow when I awoke and... |
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A Survivor
Will I be a survivor Or wind up a statistic instead As I go through the treatments I wonder what lies ahead After the treatment is over You can relax for a while And if things go real good You might even smile Is the cancer gone ... |
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A Thought
Copyright © 1995, Kiersten Van Houten In my head In my mind, In the deepest part of me, A thought grows, And it gets bigger, Beginning to overload my head With an emotion, Sometimes sad. ... |
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A Valentine
Copyright © 1994 to Jane Wisniewski Reprinted on OncoLink with permission of the author I come to you for help with the things the doctors can't deal with I dump my sorrows out like so much dirty laundry. We agree I have a job to... |
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A View Today
Today as I go about my way May beauty catch my eye. I'll look for kindness to appear In others as I go by. May people who need a smile from me And chance to see my face, Catch from that view a kinder world Than in some... |
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A Virtual Interview with Jean Shinoda Bolen, MD
Jean Shinoda Bolen, MD, is a psychiatrist, Jungian analyst, clinical Professor of psychiatry at the University of California San Francisco, a Distinguished Life Fellow of the American Psychiatric Association and the 2002 recipient of Pacific Medical... |
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A Virtual Q & A with Dr. Karen Ritchie
Q - Please expand on what you had in mind when you wrote in the introduction to your book Angels & Bolters: Women?s Cancer Scripts, that "...medicine as a whole is blinded by its own script." A - American medicine sees its role as... |
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Absurdities to Live For
Breast in a Box Hair in a Handbag -how Absurd! Sapphires in a Sack? Truffles in a Trunk? Butter in a Basket? ... |
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Affirmation
The breasts are gone But I am Whole Disfigurement Need not include My soul... |
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After Cancer
She rarely talks about it these days, except with her husband and those in her support group. She's learned that family members tend to shift uncomfortably in chairs, change the subject quickly Friends have peeled away in layers; the hard... |
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Alone
Don't be alone the doctor said For awhile keep people nearby Don't be alone with just yourself until you feel better But I couldn't wait to get them out Away from the house and from my rooms Where I could pace ... |
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Amethyst House
Amethyst House is located across the street from the Cancer Centre in Thunder Bay, Ontario. It provides accommodation for out of town patients who are in town to receive cancer treatment. This poem is dedicated to Harvey and Flo, two good... |
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And When She Was Bad
You've seen the ugly side of me The livid, darkened, screwed up face You've heard me shout some bitter words (intense for even human race) You've watched me tear up tender roots Of love, and hurl them to the wind (In total rage at faith and... |
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Anger in a Group Setting
My stomach clenches at the sight of her pursed lips, the lines bracketing a mouth drooping low. Her whispery voice with its false note of joy rasps the bones in my ears like dull saws scraping wet wood. She steals time- my time, your... |
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Another Time Around
This week we learned of a new tumor. It is where I can see and feel. We don't know what the treatment will be, But the tumor and spirit can heal. No one knows the path of cancer, But we persevere in spite of its wrath. That storm has... |
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Apricot Jam
Giddy with spring, gulping fresh soft air, she pushed her healed body up a rickety ladder into the green crown of the tree. Across her plaid-shirted back the sun played a pattern of leaf and branch. Hands plunged among the fruit, she... |
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Before And After
I remember water touching my body differently as, still whole, I lay in that last hot bath. Now I discover a freckle beneath where my breast once was and feel a newness come over me. I ask god to tell me he loves me and he answers ... |
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Beginning Treatment
Bill is "my host"—which makes me smile. I am now a frequent morning guest of the medical establishment. He's the greeter for the land of radiation beams and gaping gowns. Through his doors lie the machines That I must... |
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Begins with the Letter C
Copyright © 2001 Helen Diane Gibson What is this word? What does this mean? This word is nasty and I no longer feel clean. All thru my life, I have heard this word, But it won't happen to me, that's too absurd. I find a lump and... |
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Binary View
Sitting in the chemo room absorbing poisons to avoid our doom... some rise above the situation to find the humor, or even spark celebration. Others though are bitter and sour, the depths of which increase each hour. And all the while the... |
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Bird Feeder
Birds land, take seed and fly to the bare dogwood tree One house finch flaps its wings, hovering waiting for an empty perch red breast and head pleasing my eyes When I returned from the hospital I asked my husband to fill the bird feeder ... |
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Blossoms, Frost and Faith
Copyright © 1994 to George Krumenacker Reprinted on OncoLink with permission of the author A summer rose has touched our hearts-- her beauty, planted in our souls forever. Now we can see; the fresh, radiant Blossom ... |
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Breast Cancer Support Meeting Tonight & Refreshments Will Be Served The drug rep pulls goodies from a large shopping bag. Struggles with a dull knife. Cuts lengths of string wrapped around two white bakery boxes. With a flourish, he lifts the lids, opens twin treasure chests of... |
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Breast Cancer: My Story
I was forty in September of 1997. When my husband Steve found a lump. And let me tell you, it wasn't a little bump! I went to the breast surgeon looking and feeling my best I told the surgeon: "I'm not sick, I feel fine. Just let me... |
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Breastless
I stood in front of the mirror bare-chested, a flat slate, open field, horizonless like the round earth isn't really so round anymore. The slim trails of stitches, crooked line that climbs a little, dives a little across... |
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Breathing
A winter's sun climbs One hundred temple steps I follow behind. After chemo hour My son buys nausea meds And one fragrant rose. Cloudbanks break open Waves of yellow daffodils My body dances toward light. Underneath the scars ... |
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Business Not as Usual
The surgeon removed my urgent need for company, so I'm drawn to Joshua Tree where I watched a desert tortoise oaring the dirt. She swam into the lake of shade under my Jeep. The landscape is clear, less populated, less pebbled... |
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Calming the Cyclone
On this most terrible And awful day I made it through I did o.k. A nap helped Considerably When the what-if's And what-for's Nipped And bit at me How can One man Challenge destiny? How can He not try? Like a dog Barking threats,... |
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Cancer
Cancer Body weak and degraded by probing hands, roaming to find ill. Mind slowly disintegrating into dust tattered by yes or no questions answered by maybe. Heart broken, repaired, broken by lovers and friends who were pretending... |
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Cancer
Copyright © 2000, Lisa M. Lehman C ertainly you're sneaky, creeping up inside. A ngrily I fight you, letting go of my pride. N ever was I ready for this vicious of a blow C an I really conquer you;... |
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Cancer
Cancer is used as a metaphor For all things ugly and bad Just the mention of cancer Makes people uneasy and sad Cancer scares most people It makes them tremble in fear They don't even want .... Cancer victims near Cancer is not contagious... |
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Cancer Cat Sonnet
Hair does not fall out. Not really. It's more Of a shedding actually. Dark strands Slip out, sneak free and slide south to nest in Piles at your feet, tickling an ankle on The way down. I am a cat, a cancer Cat, losing fur as I preen and... |
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Cancer gets served
I am putting you on notice Today I see you For what you are You are weak, unwelcome And I see you for The disorganized Mistake you are You are not me You are small, weak And beaten up Washed away in A tidal wave Of immune system swoops ... |
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Cancer Is Not The End
Cancer is not a tragedy Like most people feel Though it's very serious You can survive the ordeal It can be a real nuisance And I must admit Since I was diagnosed Life has changed a bit One does a lot of thinking About life and death... |
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Care Givers
They come in odd numbers According to their relation. Some are loved ones and kin, And, some according to station. It is a wonder of devotion To observe them doing care So much of their time is spent Imploring in prayer. ... |
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Celebration
Copyright © 1998, James Pharis, Jr. Today as busy as I could be Around the house and the yard, A thought matured or at least advanced As I close-clipped the greensward. On the tractor with the loud bush hog As I sped between the trees, The... |
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Changing Partners
I slept while a cancer feasted inside of me. My lover, finding the noise disturbing, left. With no one weighting me into sleep, Darkness has become my lover. He holds me, promises not to leave. ... |
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Chemo Songs
Copyright © 1994 to Jane Wisniewski 1. Puke green, Compazine. Little white ladies, Nolvadex Speckled Cytoxan Take these and these and maybe these if you need them. Your Hair might fall out. You may gain twenty pounds. We cannot say. We... |
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Chemotherapy
Tired is a cape in the night- dark, heavy fur whose warmth stifles Tired is a long tunnel- damp, with no lights and sudden turns It's the woods, windy and full of sounds of animals, rustling- snow that melts and freezes at the same... |
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Collection of Poems by Richard Harvey
My name is Richard Harvey. In April of 2005, I was diagnosed with a rare form of brain cancer called Xanthoastrocytoma in my right temporal lobe. My medical treatments have included brain surgery, radiation and chemotherapy. I have also worked with... |
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Craig Czury: 4 O'CLOCK (Nelda)
to weep against the sea and to call out it's ok in another name to cross over your own now to raise your arm against the air to let go which is the sky waving your arm it's time against the ceiling of the chemo ward to let go slipping... |
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Dear Doctor
Copyright © 1994 to Jane Wisniewski Dear doctor I would like to say to hell with you. You give me a damned statistic -- I'd like to twist it up and say I'm as likely to be in the small group who are free as in the large group who... |
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Diagnosis, Cancer
Copyright © January 19, 1999, James A. Pharis, Jr. Shock and worry, anxiety, fear Are some of the things that hit us hard, What will happen to those we hold dear? Are some of the things we must face. Will anger and pain have... |
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Dime On!
Dime on You crazy shining I find you Heads-up In the midst Of a fantastically Positive day Every step Let it be Like today Good Luck Happiness and fortune Scramble to get In my way So light Free from misgiving Knowing so many ... |
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Dracula Meets a Chemo-Poet
Dracula comes through my window, hungry as usual, Fine, I say, hungry too, hungry for the kiss, the bite, everlasting life. He shows up in his rented suit and fine white shirt. He is wearing his company manners. "Would you be so kind," he ... |
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Dragonfly Rescue
She batted through the web before I could run back, tangling the dragonfly, and then to the ground, where it flailed about full of grit and bits of leaves. My friends beseeched me to rescue it and sighing I agreed, for... |
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Dreams of Being a Cowgirl
I am in chemotherapy for metastasized breast cancer. When I go into remission I will wear cowgirl boots with tooled flowers; ... |
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Everywhere
Copyright © 1998, James A. Pharis, Jr. Today this thought compels me, To remind myself again. That God's love is everywhere, And applied to every pain. No matter how low we feel, No matter how distraught. His love is freely... |
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Excellent Day
On this most excellent of days I ate pizza I ate steak I killed two softballs Dropped 'em in left field I played like an Ace At first base Chemo Man did Some damage And didn't need a nap Stretched and swam Talked to my sons And hung out... |
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Farewell to Hair
I stood outside on a windy day and ran my fingers through my hair. Long strands of silky threads blew across the lawn. They glistened in the sun, too many to count. I imagined a nest, lined with my mane, woven by a... |
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Footsteps and Stars: An Anthology
When stricken with breast cancer in 2005, I thought it a prime opportunity to make notes and at last, write my book. However, when I came to write sentences, I could not. I was blocked. Choked up. The only output that came from the end of my pencil... |
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For My Mother
For My Mother You said, "Why?" angry at God, angry at me. You said, "How?" even though no one could answer. You said, "Not Fair!" and everyone agreed. You said, "Life Sucks!" But only a little at a time. You said,... |
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For Those Who Wait
We did not ask for this. We did not set our platters before Death and beg, "Please, if you will, More suffering." We did not make secret pacts with our cells in the night, urging them to darker deeds. We did not stand in the middle of... |
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For You In Faith
My heart is heavy with your care. Your trouble troubles me. I ask God to hold you in his eye. He cares more than I could see. I commit myself to him in trust, Of his perfect will. He sees you in your darkest hour. Hope he gives your... |
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From The Medical Record
As you recall, she is a 45 year old perimenopausal white female who noted a palpable density in her right breast several weeks ago. Left breast was mammographically unremarkable. There is no family history of breast or ovarian ... |
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Fundamental Physical Constants For Joanne
At her desk the world is slow, the sun warms her back and plates lean lightly in their grooves on the hutch. A veneer of peach juice glistens on her forearm as she rolls the pit lazily under her tongue. It doesn't matter what she writes,... |
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Garden Sonnet Prayer
Call me recovered, yes I'm planting new Perennials - plants that spring back, recoup Year after year peek out, grow back, reach up Victorious over cold, frost, ice, snow Grow green freed from the bleakest underground Perennials - plants... |
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Getting Biopsy Results
II I suddenly want my mother and I put on a hat, a coat and boots, Because my mother is in a hot fudge sundae from Friendly's with coffee ice cream and pecans it's almonds and so that it will not be... |
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Getting Well
There is no way back from knowing. You're touched once you see its face, mouth stretched into an awful nasal a, can, as if the word was extended wide as eyes, the cer seeping out last, air from a tire, an angry s. ... |
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God's Gift
Copyright © December 1998, James A. Pharis, Jr. The gift he gave to all mankind, We celebrate each Christmas time. His gift to us we now remind Is a gift only if he's mine. To give to us his greatest gift, He parted with... |
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Got to Get Down to Know
He got down to no restaurants. He got down to no motorcycles. He got down to no womanizing. He got down to no cigarettes. He got down to no poetry. He got down to no appetite. He got down to no breath. He got down to no beat. He got down to... |
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Haiku
Radiation hums, infuses the room. My breast fills with bees. ... |
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Handling It
Copyright © 2001, Timothy Rowe He's handling it good, they say He's really getting on with his life How do they think cancer victims should act? How do they think we should handle the strife? Should we scream, "Why me, why me?" Or... |
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His Blessings
Copyright © May 1999, James A. Pharis, Jr. I have been blessed beyond my ken, More than I could ever realize. God's love to me, more than I know Makes me more than just my size. What grows within, is not to compare. As... |
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Hope
Hope is the thing with petals smiling towards the sun. A yellow beam of light streaming across a dark room. Hope is a rose with no petals bursting into full bloom. Hope is what we wish for; a paintbrush poised over pristine paper, ... |
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Hope is the Thing With Petals
The phone rings once. Then rings again. By the third insistent ring, I lift my head from the pillow and squint to see 5:22 glowing on the digital clock near the bed. Who could be calling me so early in the morning? I reach for the phone in the... |
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Hope is the Thing With Petals: Poetry Submission
25) { alert("Sorry, but you have exceeded the 25 word limit. Please reduce the length of your submission. Thank you."); return false; } } //--> What is hope? Our latest Oncolink Poetry Project invites visitors to this website to... |
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Hope is the Thing With Petals: Quotable Hope
Regardless of how hurt or wounded the individual may be, there exists a healthy part of the self straining to flower like a seed that takes root and naturally pushes through the earth toward sunlight. - Marcia Hain Every flower must grow through... |
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How to Live in a Continual Present
be given a diagnosis of cancer have your nodes removed learn that you will never know how long you may live notice how the light lingers in trees, how hawks circle, how the red maple turns green at its tips, ... |
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How to Stay Alive
Trash your cigarettes. Shun restaurants and bars that traffic in secondhand smoke. Eat organic and low on the food chain. Steam vegetables; don't grill meat. Just say "no" to marijuana, Jack Daniels and cocaine. Stay home: do not rent cars ... |
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Howler
Anger, I will leash you to a lamppost and walk away. When you how, I will look back, nod with the rest of the pedestrians, and say, "Shame on the owner of that mutt." Out of guilt I'll likely take you back, but feed you splintered chicken... |
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I Am No Longer Afraid
I am no longer afraid of mirrors where I see the sign of the amazon, the one who shoots arrows. There was a fine red line across my chest where a knife entered, but now a branch winds about the scar and travels from arm to heart. Green leaves... |
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I Entered the Room Naked
finally brought the full-length mirror to see my back, shoulder blade to heel, to see my front, ankle to stitched chest, trying to remember how they looked, those nipples, up to my hair that will be gone, too, in a few weeks. ... |
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I Kissed My Father Late
Copyright © 2000, John E. McGuigan I kissed my father late and wondered . . . wondered why those running board, afternoon deliveries were so troublesome. Newspapers and fathers were a chore then, and meant to be... |
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I Pray Today
Today I pray with faith in God. His presence I feel here. This prayer to him for another Will be heard I have no fear. Surely I don't know how it works. That's part of loving trust. He reveals to each of us himself As he... |
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If I Could...
I'd like to look into your eyes and tell you that this nightmare will vanish in the morning or take you on an ocean cruise......in hopes that cancer couldn't follow If I could, I would take you to the happy, carefree places of your youth To... |
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Illness Is
a finger crooked: c'mere there's a table set for one.... |
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Impatient Patient: Introduction
Huh? Let me explain... When I first got home from the hospital after cancer surgery #8, out of nowhere, this new phrase appeared in my vocabulary: impatient patient. Over the next few weeks as I recovered, I found myself regularly repeating those... |
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Impatient Patient: Poem
Impatient Patient by Alysa Cummings (for Julia Darling, in appreciation) Such an impatient patient... I’m waiting for gas to pass, stitches to dissolve, and visiting nurses to knock on my front door. One week post-op I’m... |
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Impatient Patient: Quotes
Impatient Patient Quotations Collected by Alysa Cummings Adopt the pace of nature: her secret is patience. -Ralph Waldo Emerson The difficulty with becoming a patient is that as soon as you get horizontal, part of your being yearns, not for a... |
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In Limbo
Things should go back to normal now At least that's how you feel You've had your cancer treatment And have survived the ordeal But now you find yourself in limbo Not knowing which way to turn Life as you knew it is gone And you know... |
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In the Biopsy Room
My breast has swallowed something bulbous, the size of a walnut, the texture of cotton swabs. How obvious it is, this thing, this invader who leaves tracks. This is a lump, this whoosh of light on a gray veiny surface: mammogram begging to be... |
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In The Darkness
Copyright © 1999, James A. Pharis, Jr. Dear friends of mine and those to be In midst of night when thoughts are low, When darkness and doubts remain, Reflect and know this refrain.. Sometime all have doubts and fears That... |
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In the Hospital
When they came at me with sharp knives I put perfume under my nose. When they knocked me out on the operating table I dreamed I was flying. When they asked me embarrassing questions I remembered the clouds in the sky. When they were... |
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Isaac Stern's Performance
Here plants-gold and dry-rustle up green at soil's edge. Music roils in the room where I wait, my chest holding even at the scar's edge. Whatever chances I took paid off and now I have only the rest of my life to consider Once it was a... |
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It Does Not Have You
Copyright © 2001, Timothy Rowe Cancer - you're one of them now You will go through hell Will you be a victim or a survivor Only time and attitude will tell How you respond to the diagnosis Is a choice you alone make To say that it... |
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It's a Celebration
It's a celebration! "Heather Feels Good Day!" I hold my breath for the phone to ring Hello? Hello? Hello, guess what... it's Heather Feels Good Day! It's not when Heather's just okay, she feels fine, she went shopping. It's Heather... |
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Judgment Call
I am willing to spend a day teaching children But I am not willing to track investments. It was one thing when I had All the time in the world. It is another thing now. I am willing to cook a tasty meal But I will not... |
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Just Right
Facing south Towards winter-lit windows Moment in time She reclines On couch Surrounded by Dogs, sandals, magazines A bong And empty candy bowls Drinking coffee And Cream Eating cherry pie Drizzled with Hersheys syrup All is well Sunday... |
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Lament
Listen, children; Your father is dead. From his old coats I'll make you little jackets; I'll make you little trousers; From his old pants; There'll be in his pockets Things he used to put there, Keys and pennies Covered with tobacco; Dan... |
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Legacy
A legacy is something left to the living. It's most often intended as a gift of love. It's money, or lands, or other tangibles. But the legacy I have came from above. In God's great scheme of this world, In which those who have gone before... |
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Letter C
I'm lying here in bed tonight, Wondering if everything will be all right. See, I have this stuff in my breast, And they keep doing test after test. Dr's are trying to get me ready for the big day, Will they get it all? Will they make it go... |
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Letters Received
You are in my thoughts are with you are part of the ?prayer chain? at our church will say a mass for you accept all prayers on your behalf we will say a rosary for you tonight lots of people are calmly, psychically ... |
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Lifting My Shirt
This morning two weeks after surgery, the utter absence of my breast shouts silence after all the frantic months of lifting up my shirt. At 3, I see the oncologist, the incision is healing well, how nicely it curves to my armpit, then... |
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Like a Thief in the Night
Cancer approaches like darkness To cover you in its gloom Sometimes there are no signs To warn of the impending doom It comes like a thief in the night To steal your essence away It robs you of the things you need To live and love... |
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Limitless
Could I love the starlit sky if I did not also love the sun the reflection of the meadow in a horse's eye the curve of my nose even the sound of my own voice though I have spoken with the spite of Esau and wept because I had asked for too much?... |
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Making Chicken Soup
I am in control chopping onions into thin slivers, adding parsley to the pot, scraping off every fragile piece of chicken from the bone. Returning handfuls to the stock, I find my fingernails filled with bits of chicken, ... |
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Manifested Best
On this most welcome And wonderful of days I did not rush to get up I created my way I deliberated direction Got lots accomplished This day would be Pleasant and Peaceful All this suited me Breakfast and chores Were thoroughly enjoyed ... |
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Momento
He drives toward the tunnel Under airport runway And thinks of a wish For his breath to hold He sucks two lungfuls And dreams With his love To grow old Slowly gliding Hope full of chest No hurry, no rush Enjoying passing through tunnel ... |
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Moonsets
The first morning, the moon bounces off the back of my sleeping head, a full ball, full of wake up, watch how I make my way down the cloud ladders, how I blast a path on water, how even when I disappear behind a thick rung light sprays... |
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My Brother
Copyright © 2001 Stella Dunstan Today's the day he's going to die Today's the day I'm going to cry I cuddled him, but he was gone He'd told me life must carry on Lifeless and limp he lay in the chair I really feel this life's unfair ... |
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My Muse
My muse is a stoner She's cool She's cheesy She wants to be easy She loves the bud Lazy Daisy Loosy Lipety doozie Digedy dimble Wamedy whimby Thickety wickedly Dickety doozy Oozy groovy Tipety two-shoes Wiffidy Sniffidy Quinshick ... |
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No Easy Way
When you're diagnosed with cancer Your choices of treatment are few At first you really can't believe What they plan to do to you But there is no easy way to treat cancer To beat it you need heavy-duty stuff But you pray that they know... |
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No Lesser Love
How can I give my all to God, And why should I now be concerned? The question presses on me now, That Christmas time has returned. We celebrate and bring to mind The birth of Christ in God's own plan. How can a gift to match... |
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Now Only One of Us Remains
Now that the wave has come and gone Where are my feelings Now that the sky has darkened and then lightened Where are my feelings Looking at myself in the mirror who is it, Who is that lopsided stranger Washing up and down the shore Now... |
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O Body
O body- for 41 years 1,573 experts with 14,355 combined years of training have failed to cure your wounds. Deep inside, I am whole.... |
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One Drop
Cancer has returned. Is the glass half-empty or half-full? Sometimes this is NOT the question. At first glance, the glass may seem to have toppled, spilling the contents and eliminating the question altogether. Perhaps the better question is... |
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One Good Thing About My Yearly Mammogram
I'm in and out of there, I swear, in the blink of an eye. Moving at warp speed, clothes peeled to the waist in seconds flat. Motion lines blur, tremble on either side of me. I fight off demons that recur, mute their evil chatter (we... |
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One Hundred and Ten Days
Under this roof of rectangular things: the motorized bed; electrical outlets; metallic I.V. machines, clicking And humming-the only things oddly shaped are the people In the angled-up beds and the round hanging bags of chemotherapy. The... |
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One Year Later
it's true death doesn't fully kick in for a year but this wasn't what i was talking about on purpose i dragged my bed out to the sand as if you can really choose who you come from the way they sound except there were never any books... |
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Otherwise
From Prairie Schooner (winter 1995) by permission of the University of Nebraska Press. I got out of bed on two strong legs. It might have been otherwise. I ate cereal, sweet milk, ripe, flawless peach. It might have been otherwise. I... |
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Patsy's Truth
A very personal thing occurs When you have been diagnosed. Cancer is the most dreaded word Than any other word supposed. We can meet the challenge of cancer. We can resolve it in our mind. We can believe we are not the first To... |
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Perfidy (My Body Has Betrayed Me)
Copyright © 2000, Lisa M. Lehman My body has betrayed me, deprived me of intent. The will survives, my strength wearied, another day desist. Comprehension turned frustration, devotion deviate, The important things that I held close,... |
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Persephone's Bloom
I buy myself pink tulips to celebrate my long winter being over, wear a pink ribbon on my lapel- a stripe crossed, like my friends' fingers. Pink is about luck, the softening of red with a taste of white. Not aspirin white, but white of... |
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Poems
Copyright 1995, Mark B. Johnson, Sr. Simple Question When It Began Constant Where Do I Find How Can It Be? Dedication For Viola Oh God! Gift Death Waves in Passing Simple Question Such a simple question... |
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Prefatory
I am often unsure how to begin as a bird who holds in her mouth the first twigs of a new nest and not far below the gray cat squinting in the full sun... |
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Prognosis
A very tough bubble Can some times suddenly Burst Leave us suffocating In the lashing gusts Of probability Possibility and mortality Be careful Your words Can smack the hopeful And immortal air Past my microns-thin Shiny, glistening ... |
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Promise
A rainbow arcs over the field of corn my life, a pot of gold.... |
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Quotable Quotes About Anger
O! let me not be mad, not mad, sweet heaven; Keep me in temper; I would not be mad! William Shakespeare, King Lear I was angry with my friend I told my wrath, my wrath did end. I was angry with my foe: I told it not, my wrath did grow. ... |
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Radiation Treatment
Copyright © 2001, Timothy Rowe Your body positioned by your tattoo You hold rigid, awaiting the sound Of atoms shooting through you .... the stillness all around You lie there praying That things don't go askew You count off the... |
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Reconstruction
for B.G. She stands on a low stool wearing blue surgical booties and a dazed expression, limp cotton gown at her feet. Plastic men with purple magic markers (permanent pointy tip) circle her, chatter in matching mint green scrubs, slowly... |
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Recovery
The fingers of the rain are tapping again. I send out my heart's drum. Blood stripe on the feathered tulip dissolves into wet. All night a low thrumming. Up, up the two-toned hosta green from sopped earth. Along your bruised ribs, cream... |
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Recovery
Artificially old, through scalpel and pain, I spend long hours in a rocking chair under the sycamore. Get a sense of the distanced calm I see in my elders as my pace is slowed to theirs. The spool of time unwinds its long trail of sunsets. ... |
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Recurrence
I could live the rest of my life without it. But if cancer recurs can I count on the recurrence of hope and courage too?... |
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Reminiscence
The day I finished chemotherapy they surrounded me with a group hug. I said, "You have been kind to me. I will miss you." They said, "It is good to miss us. Remember us, but don't come back." The day I finished radiation ... |
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Remission
The wounds of war have never fully healed. I live with pain, and I will never, ever get to be quite whole again. The battle took its toll. My strength is gone. I cannot walk too fast or go too far. Each day I do... |
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Repair
In my house, men tear out the floor: hammering, then wood splits- hour on hour. You almost need safety glasses for this work, the blond says and truly, as I go for the phone, the kitchen is now rubble. Delight a paste bubble in my... |
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Robin's Nest
Fragile sky walls Gentle, pulsing invisible force Nestled by twiggy protection Incubating surprise and wonderment of emergence... Who placed these blossoms? Who arranged that spring would greet you?... |
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Rose
My mother gave me a rose for my birthday. A tea rose, Chrysler Imperial, blood red. I planted it in the front yard So I would see it, coming and going. I'd just gotten married. It bloomed every year, the most beautiful reds On eighteen inch... |
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Scar Tissue
Copyright © 1997 Laurie O'Brien The body heals. One year later I can see in the bathroom mirror that the skin is all of a color. The long red line of the scar has soothed itself into a pale crease. The gathers where skin was stitched,... |
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Seed
She is alive. Although her doctors said there was nothing to be done, she is home, planting her summer garden, is not dead, and plans to eat everything she has grown in this plot, each carrot and tomato, each squash, pepper, lettuce leaf. ... |
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Seeing Beyond Sight
To walk in faith, my prayer shall be. To step beyond where I can see, Is the mark of trust in Thee, My Savior and my God. No blind disregard for care, No foolhardy risk we share, To launch a course unaware, To be bold for Christ our... |
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Seeing Red: Cancer and anger, in poems and pictures
Introduction By Alysa Cummings A cancer diagnosis. Anger. The cause-effect relationship between a serious health crisis and a person's strong emotional reaction to it seems so obvious. Commonsensical, even. Maybe that's why my mother wasted ... |
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Set Free
Copyright © 2000, Timothy Rowe Don't look at me With pity in your eyes. Don't say ... what next? Referring to my demise Cancer has shown me What real life can be Life has more meaning now That my heart and soul are free I can... |
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Silent Song by Patti Filion
This time of year the words I hear, A cancer cure is nearly here. The words come often to late for some, Another year the damage done. Another heart is full of pain And all the efforts are made in vein A cure a little late you see For... |
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Slow dancing at the Med-Inn
It's the night before your mastectomies. I'm sitting on the end of the bed. (We got the faded-orange-curtain-40-watt-lightbulb- green-chenille-bedspread room.) From the shower, you suddenly loom over me, smelling of... |
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Socrates on the Fear of Death
To fear death is nothing other than to think oneself wise when one is not; for it is to think one knows what one does not know. No man knows whether death may not even turn out to be the greatest blessing for a human being; and yet people fear... |
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Some Spirit 'o Spring Quotable Quotes
No matter how long the winter, spring is sure to follow. ? Proverb from Guinea O the green things growing the green things growing, The fair sweet smell of the green things growing. ? Dinah Mulock Craik Spring unlocks the flowers to paint... |
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Spring
Copyright © 1994 to Jane Wisniewski Reprinted on OncoLink with permission of the author Where is hope for the helpless? Where do I find the faith I've lost? A snowdrop nods its wise, white head. A crocus opens up. ... |
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Suddenly, Life Changes the diagnosis
I sit on the edge of a cataclysmic abyss straddling the horizon on a day made of clay, as sand dissipates under my feet and I dream of falling. ... |
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Survivor's Guide to Post-Operative Body Image Issues
if the scars upset you that much she said, just stop looking at them. you can take a shower without looking down. yes you can. ... |
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Symmetry in the Blue Dress Sonnet
The blue dress hangs in the closet on a Padded hanger, under plastic to keep The shoulders round. It's a sweater dress with Buttons down the front, a deep vee neck style. What a wonderful dress, deep navy blue, That embraces the... |
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Terrible Word
The senior nurse stood, solid, at the foot of my bed. White hair kinked over white uniform, ultra bright teeth bared in a ferocious smile. She agreed the words were awful, said in her southern mountain voice, We've... |
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That Lucky Guy Sonnet
Some intern christened me Post-Op-Who-Limps With-Three-Drains, but in twenty-five steps I'm Past the nursing station, ice machine and Clean laundry; ten steps more and I'm home free; Off the ward, shuffling by on-call cells with M.D.'s-to-be... |
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The Bad Man
I dreamed of an intruder again, last night- In the yard, on the periphery of my home. I ran out to meet him, maybe to savage him, But he escaped over the rough, wooden fence, Leaving only a muddy footprint across the slats To... |
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The Beast
Copyright © 2001, The Author "We'll have to wait and see" they say as the wheels grind slowly on get up and go to work today Chin up and move along don't think about what just might be or run and hide your eyes Just mozie on like... |
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The Beginning of a New Day . . .
"This is the beginning of a new day. I have been given this day to use as I will. I can waste it or use it for good. What I do today is important because I'm exchanging a day of my life for it. When tomorrow comes, this day will be gone... |
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The Cancer Patient Talks Back
No. I don't want to hear about your uncle and how he lived three years after being diagnosed. And I don't want to hear how many times your cousin threw up when she had chemo. Nor how your neighbor's baby had twelve toes maybe from... |
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The Diagnosis
Copyright © 1998, James Lynch The year was 1997, on the 28th of May. The surgery was finished, then the news without delay. My wife was there beside me, when the doctor came to speak. Even though I'd just awakened, I could hear the... |
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The Face
Copyright © 1998, James Pharis, Jr. THE FACE The face that looked back at me, The eyes that beheld what is to be, The thoughts they invoke for me to see, Are not all that comprises the most of me. It challenges me though, to be more than... |
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The Fight
Copyright © 2001, Timothy Rowe A friend died today We just said goodbye to him He was in a fight with cancer A fight he didn't win We met at the treatment center Were friends right from the start No talk of death  just life And... |
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The Gingko Tree
Today we planted a Ginkgo tree. The dirt on that slope was hardly land. The soil was mixed with potting soil, Epsom salts and what came to hand. It's not very tall or stately now. It's very small and green and grey. It was watered well... |
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The Knife
Five years ago a surgeon's knife severed a breast to save my life. It was a fair exchange. I still survive. And I no longer need that chunk of flesh to feed a child or lure a lover. But I have become a voyeur. ... |
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The Last Thing I See
The first thing I saw when I swam up from anesthesia was your face furrowed with worry lines, your smile. I felt your hand clasp mine, warm below the IV, felt your butterfly lips touch my forehead. Since then mine was... |
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The Looking Glass
My head hurt as if my hair was tied in a thousand tiny tight pony tails. My technician in the radiation department suggested I have someone cut my hair and it would relieve the pressure. That night my husband and daughter tried to... |
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The Mastectomy Poems: 1. The Bridge
You never think it will happen to you, What happens every day to other women. Then as you sit paging a magazine, Its beauties lying idly in your lap, Waiting to be routinely waved good-bye Until next year, the mammogram technician ... |
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The Mastectomy Poems: 2. The Gurney
What's this long corridor above the street What are these glazed beige tiles Why in my horizontal state Am I so like an undemanding child After they wheel me in my bassinet Into the operating room Who made the muslin sheets so dry and white... |
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The Mastectomy Poems 12. Epilogue: Nevertheless The bookbag on my back, I'm out the door. Winter turns to spring The way it does, and I buy dresses. A year later, it gets to where When they say How are you feeling, With that anxious look on their faces, And I start to tell them the latest ... |
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The Path
The crows on the trees lining the path to the lake are full of winter I'm trying to think of spring because then my treatments end But I've forgotten tulips, can't remember the smell of hyacinths What's real is the drive to the doctor the... |
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The Power of the Pink Ribbon
There's a ribbon tied in a lopsided bow around a handle on one of my kitchen cabinets. A pink satin ribbon, as a matter of fact. It arrived by mail on a wintry day five years ago in the first hefty package of information from my insurance company.... |
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The Woman Whose Body Is Not Her Own
She is not herself anymore, hasn't been since she stood before the mirror in her own bathroom, holding her own toothbrush, an ordinary gesture, two days later. She was lucky to be alive, they all said, lucky to lose something she didn't... |
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These Days
When I say I'm scared my friends scoff. The word they say is challenged I say I'm pissed. Enlightened nostrils flare. The word is uncomfortable People cringe at the word cancer, avoid me and say on the run, Darling, you must stop... |
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This Breast Surgeon
For E.J.M. They look at the films together. Oh, I don't like this. I don't like this one bit, he says. This breast surgeon points to her x-ray Traces lazy circles with his fingertips Reaches for a small white writing pad (The name of a... |
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Thoughts During Chemo
Copyright © 1995, Marsha Penrose The Last Sunset, and spun silver wings no longer flutter Hopelessly drawn to the flame of my suffering. Time is an ant dragging a crust of bread across the sun baked sidewalk. So I dream of... |
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To Answer Your Question: Why I Take Pictures of Flowers...
Oncolink Poet-in-residence and breast cancer survivor Alysa Cummings believes in the healing power of writing and photography. But especially pictures of flowers. In her latest piece, she shares some favorites from her summer garden and tries to... |
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To Explain
The future is what does not happen - Colette The euphorbia shot a pale rilled tube toward the light, so all week I have been grieving, pouring deep gutturals into the stone edgings of the back garden, down on my knees, seeming to dig the... |
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To Hell & Back: Cancer, Myth and Meaning
Introduction By Alysa Cummings The lab technician pats and slaps and stares intently at the crook of my left arm. She presses down purposefully, first in one spot, then another. Her gloved fingers inch bit by bit across the skin on my inner... |
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To Hell & Back: Quotable Quotes
It is easy to go down into Hell; night and day, the gates of dark Death stand wide; but to climb back again, to retrace one's steps to the upper air – there's the rub, the task. – Virgil Those who have learned by experience what... |
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Transformation
It was a torn garbage bag on the parking lot; Not noticed nor respected in the trash. It came to my attention today As it soared aloft with a puff of wind. I stood there and watched as it lifted high, With grace and beauty all its own. ... |
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Uterine Cancer
In the midst of this madness...I lost myself. Just at the time in my life When I almost knew myself. Cancer survivor? I am not sure. Will I ever be? Doubts of the permanence of cancer's final demise. Questions saturate my mind day and... |
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Waiting
It's Monday morning At a quarter to ten I sit here waiting For PSA results again It happens every three months It's something I dread They're checking to see If the cancer has spread If the test is high It means further treatment ... |
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Waiting
Copyright © 2000, John E. McGuigan Waiting. In that rushing quiet when nothing moves Except the unreal sounds Of coal chutes and rocking-horse hooves And make-shift pitcher's mounds, I sit expectant, motionless, And stare at... |
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Waiting Room
Let me now speak of the waiting room, That outer chamber, that gate to hell, More like a motel than a tomb, Where a faint antiseptic smell Invades the bleak halls. This is not A place of fun, where Disneys go. It is neither too cold nor too... |
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Walking the Green Mile Sonnet
The first case of the day has the challenge Of walking the green mile. No gurney. No Wheelchair. Just a friendly stroll pushing an I.V. pole down a dark hallway chilled to Subzero temperature. It feels like the Last mile, but there's no... |
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We Give Thanks
We give thanks , Oh God, For who you are. For all that we know about. We thank you too For all that we haven't seen. We give thanks, Oh God, For the friends we have, For those who will be friends, In the future. We give thanks,... |
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WHAT AM I?
Copyright © 2001 Stella Dunstan Creative Communication 01480 380150 I wouldn't say that I was glam. Starting long, I finish short, Putting you on life support. I make a mess, I don't smell nice, And accompanying me is a very high... |
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What Healing Is
For Toni When breast cancer had me I only could write about fear: the smiling impervious doctors, the devices they used that squeezed and pierced and sliced, drew blood, singed and severed, then the taut and... |
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What I Want
Dr. Lerner's voice wakes me with the word malignant. I want Vic. He comes, squeezes my hands, strokes my face, kisses my lips The future takes a new shape A mastectomy. A biopsy of the other breast. Chemotherapy Perhaps... |
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What is Class?
Class never runs scared. It is sure-footed and confident in the knowledge that you can meet life head-on and handle whatever comes along. Class never makes excuses. It takes its lumps and learns from past mistakes. Class is considerate of others.... |
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What You See Ain't What You Get
I've been sliced and diced and carved up nice, put back together with plastic and wire. I sashay forth, head high, chest out, take on the world I meet. So, buddy, when the lights are low, the mood's right, we're... |
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Where It's At
I toss the wig, go bald to the courthouse in my stunning scalp and Nordstrom suit. I bald it to the mall, beach, movies, poetry readings where I'm the reader, to holiday parties. When people ask what happened, I say I'm taking a break... |
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Who's Worth
This little thought, this simple thought; But a thought we can't abide Invades our minds at funny times. It says "Where do you think you hide?" An island in the sea of life Is not in fact, our destiny. Each is a part of all who are... |
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With Right of Survivorship
(for Ann) Hard it is to lose a friend Whose dying could foretell my end And hard it is to pick up strands Of living, when those other hands Are stilled which often soothed my brow And gave me courage up to... |
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Wolf Woman
Under flesh seared in sudden flame they howled. Enraged voices bubbled in blisters from scorched, peeling skin. Through long months of drugs, knives, bandages, the subterranean creatures growled when she wept, snarled with short-fused... |
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Womb of the Night Sky
I was tumbling in a roll and a loll away from Ursa Mamma Bear and her lovely fur of darkness and my extravagant dreams The eggshell-blue eyes of a woman in scrubs tells me about tubes and lymph and hospital stays. She blurs, becomes part of... |
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You Will Be Just Fine
Please do not trivialize My suffering. You who are healthy You whose mortality is as yet Only dimly perceived- Please do not say "You will be just fine." I may well be-someday- But I do not know... You do not know...... |
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Your Shadow by Patti Filion
While standing in the shadow, of a child you hardly knew, Our thoughts turned to him, ours also turned to you. It?s hard to be a parent and watch your child die, It?s also hard to watch the ones as they begin to cry. They miss you in your... |
Instant Fill in the Blanks Poetry
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| The Abramson Cancer Center of the University of Pennsylvania Receives Two-Year $500,000 Grant From Lance Armstrong Foundation to Establish Cancer Survivorship Program |
| Accessing the Implanted Port Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Addressing Unanswered Questions About Sexuality Barbara Rabinowitz, RN, MSW, PhD |
| Anemia Self-survey Author: OrthoBiotech Oncology |
| Ann Marie Dismuke Ann Marie Dismuke |
| Are you Anemic? Author: OrthoBiotech Oncology |
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| Care of Your Button Feeding Device Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Caregiver Web sites |
| Checking For Residual Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Chemotherapy Copyright © 2000 Amgen Inc. All rights reserved. |
| Coming Off the Pump for Implanted Ports Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Coping with Loss and Grief Web Sites |
D
| Daily Care for External Central Catheter Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Daily Care for Implanted Ports Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Dick and Nancy, A Story of Hope - Part II Ralph Warrington |
| Dick and Nancy, A Story of Hope - Part III Ralph Warrington |
| Do our patients hear what we teach? Carol Einhorn, MS, RN, CURN, GNP, CS |
| Drawing Up Heparin Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Drawing Up Sodium Chloride Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Dressing Change for External Central Catheter With Gauze Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Dressing Change for External Central Catheter With Tegaderm Penn Home Infusion Team |
F
| Fatigue and Cancer Author: OrthoBiotech Oncology |
| Feeding by Gravity Flow Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Fighting Fatigue Author: OrthoBiotech Oncology |
| Flushing External Central Catheter Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Flushing External Central Catheter (SASH Method) Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Flushing the Implanted Port Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Flushing Your Tube Penn Home Infusion Team |
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| Gastric Feeding Button Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Gastrostomy Tube Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Giving Medicines Through the Feeding Tube Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Going on the Pump Penn Home Infusion Team |
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| Handling Supplies Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Handwashing Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Help Section for External Central Catheters Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Help Section for Feeding Button Tubes Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Help Section for Implanted Port Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Help Section for Tube Feedings Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Hospice Web sites |
| How the Social Worker can help owners of pets with cancer |
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| Infection Precautions Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Intravenous Hydration Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Inventory Management for Enternal Nutrition Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Inventory Management for IV Fluids Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Inventory Management for Pain Management Penn Home Infusion Team |
| IV Medications Iventory Management Penn Home Infusion Team |
| IV Push Medications Penn Home Infusion Team |
| IV Push Medications Penn Home Infusion Team |
| IV Push Medications Penn Home Infusion Team |
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| Jejunal Feeding Button Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Jejunostomy Tube Penn Home Infusion Team |
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| Low White Blood Cell Count/Neutropenia |
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| Managing the Effects of Gynecologic Cancer Treatment on Quality of Life and Sexuality Polly Sacco Ezzell, RN, OCN |
| Medications/Antibiotics Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Meeting Sexuality Needs of Women With Breast Cancer Linda Bloom |
| Michael White: The 1997 American Cancer Society's Courage Award Winner Michael White, capnmikew@mindspring.com |
| Mixing Protein Powder Penn Home Infusion Team |
| My Life After Cancer Jamee Tanner, JameeT@INFOCISION.COM |
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| Nasoenteric Tube Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Neupogen Administration Penn Home Infusion Team |
| NEUPOGEN® (Filgrastim) Copyright © 2000 Amgen Inc. All rights reserved. |
| Neutropenia (Infection) Copyright © 2000 Amgen Inc. All rights reserved. |
| Nutrition During Treatment Web Sites |
O
| Office Visit Checklist Author: OrthoBiotech Oncology |
| OncoLink Automated Email Discussion Group Subscriber |
| OncoLink News In Focus: Soy foods get a boost - Are they good for you? Marilynn Larkin, MA |
| OncoLink News In Focus: What's the scoop on trans fat? Marilynn Larkin, MA |
| Overview of Neutropenia and Infection Copyright © 2000 Amgen Inc. All rights reserved. |
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| Pain Control Therapy - Analgesia Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Parenteral Gravity Drip Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Patient Packet Author: OrthoBiotech Oncology |
| Penn Home IT Glossary Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Percutaneous Endoscopy Gastronomy (PEG Tube) Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Peripheral Catheter Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Personal Fatigue Diary Author: OrthoBiotech Oncology |
| Preparing Tube Feedings Penn Home Infusion Team |
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| The Reproductive Needs of the Cancer Patient Luis Blasco M.D |
| Roswellness Heidi Lynn Brown |
S
| Sexuality and Breast Cancer: Overview of Issues Authors: Kerry V. Harwood, RN, MSN, and Anne P. O'Connor, RN, MSN |
| Sexuality Web Sites |
| Spring 2001 Nutrition Nuggets Newsletter |
| Summary of Issues Identified by Cancer Survivors on OncoLink Linda A. Jacobs, PhD, CRNP, Wendy Hobbie, MSN, CRNP, and Anna T. Meadows, MD |
| Summer 2001 Nutrition Nuggets Newsletter |
| Survivorship Web Sites |
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| Ten Ways to Care for the Caregiver FOCUS on Oncology |
| To Use the Button and Adapter Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Total Parenteral Nutrition Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Total Parenteral Nutrition (TPN) Inventory Management Penn Home Infusion Team |
W
| What is anemia? Author: OrthoBiotech Oncology |
| What You Can Do Today Copyright © 2000 Amgen Inc. All rights reserved. |
Y
| Your Infusion Work Area Penn Home Infusion Team |
| Your Personal Plan Penn Home Infusion Team |
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